Johnny Came Home Headless

<br>Oh, Johnny was a tall man but his memory was short <br>He`d forget to at doorways and often he`d get hurt <br>I took good care of him for he had no family <br>Actually he did, but he forgot who they be <br><br>Johnny often liked to go out on the town <br>He`d forget where he`d be going so he`d just wander around <br>I when he was back for I would hear the smack <br>Of his head hitting the doorway but tonight it was alack <br><br>Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace <br>But wherever it`s a-lying there`s a smile upon his face <br>I should have seen it coming, he finally lost his mind <br>But if his head don`t turn up soon then all his hats are mine <br><br>Johnny came towards me but suddenly he stopped <br>As if trying to think of something but having no luck <br>Still he didn`t notice that his head weren`t there <br>`Til he took out a brush and tried to comb his hair <br><br>I said, &quot;Johnny where`s your cranium?&quot; but he didn`t seem to know <br>He just shrugged his shoulders and tried to find his nose <br>And the sight of him there topless made me start to cry <br>For I feared we`d ne`er again see eye to eye<br><br>Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace <br>But wherever it`s a-lying there`s a smile upon his face <br>I should have seen it coming, he should have stayed in bed <br>For now I fear he`ll spend his life just trying to get ahead <br><br>Refusing to believe that he had split for good <br>His lower half and me searched the neighbourhood <br>It soon became apparent that his head we wouldn`t find it <br>He could not retrace his steps, he was absent minded <br><br>Well years went by til late one night I heard a voice I swore <br>Was Johnny calling out to me, I flung open the door <br>Johnny`s head was home, it took a taxi cab <br>Alas, it was too late, his body had gone bad <br><br>Johnny`s head was homeless, his body was cremated <br>And the funeral was harder than he had anticipated <br>I should of seen it coming he said in his eulogy <br>But never thought I`d have to say I ain`t got no-body <br><br>(I ain`t got nobody) <br><br>Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace <br>But now his head`s upon a shelf, a smile upon his face <br>But now his head`s upon a shelf, a smile upon his face