The Night Before Larry Was Stretched

<br>The night before larry was stretched<br><br><br><br><br><br>Oh, the night before larry was stretched<br><br>Well the boys they all paid him a visit<br><br>A bit in their sacks too they fetched<br><br>For they sweated their duds till they ris it<br><br>For larry was always the lad<br><br>When a boy was condemned to the squeezer<br><br>Would fence all the duds that he had<br><br>For to help his poor friend to a sneezer--<br><br>-- and warm his ol gob fore he died<br><br><br><br>Well the boys they came crowding in fast<br><br>And they threw all their stools round about him<br><br>Six glims round his trap-case was placed<br><br>For he couldnt be well-waked without them<br><br><br><br>When one of them asked, &quot;could he die<br><br>Without having duly repented? &quot;<br><br>Said larry, &quot;thats all in me eye<br><br>And first by the clergy invented--<br><br>--for to get a fat bit for themselves&quot;<br><br><br><br>&quot;oh and Ill be cut up like a pie:<br><br>And me nob from me body be parted.<br><br>Youre in the wrong box, then, says i,<br><br>For blast me if theyre so hard-hearted<br><br><br><br>&quot;a chalk on the back of your neck<br><br>Is all that jack catch dares to give you<br><br>Then mind not such trifles affect<br><br>Oh why should the likes of them grieve you? --<br><br>--and now boys, come tip us the deck.&quot;<br><br><br><br>Well the cards being called for they played<br><br>Until larry found one of them cheated<br><br>A point in his napper was made<br><br>For the boy hed been easily heated<br><br><br><br>&quot;oh, hold me the hokey, you thief!<br><br>Ill scuttle your knob with me dodle!<br><br>You cheat me because Im in grief<br><br>Ah, but soon Ill demolish your noddle--<br><br>--and leave you your claret to drink&quot;<br><br><br><br>Then the clergy came in with his book<br><br>And he spoke him so smooth and so civil<br><br>Larry tipped him kill-sour look<br><br>And he pitched his big wig to the devil<br><br><br><br>Then sighing he threw back his head<br><br>For to get a sweet drop of the bottle<br><br>And dutiful sighing he said,<br><br>&quot;oh the hempt twill be soon round me throttle--<br><br>--and choke me poor windpipe to death.<br><br><br><br>&quot;oh then sure its the best way to die<br><br>Oh the dead are no better the living<br><br>For now when the gallows is high<br><br>Our journey is shorter to heaven.&quot;<br><br><br><br>But what harasses larry the most<br><br>And makes his soul poor melancholy<br><br>Is he thinks of the time when his ghost<br><br>It will come in a sheet to sweet molly--<br><br>--&quot;oh sure, itll kill her alive&quot;<br><br><br><br>So moving, these last words he spoke<br><br>We all vented our tears in a shower<br><br>For me own part I thought me heart broke<br><br>For to see him cut down like a flower<br><br><br><br>On his travels we watched him next day<br><br>The throttler I thought I could kill him<br><br>But larry not one word did say<br><br>Nor change did he come to king william--<br><br>--and then did his color grow white.<br><br><br><br>When he came to the old dublin chit<br><br>He was tucked up so neat and so pretty<br><br>The rumbler jugged off from his feet<br><br>And he died with his face to the city<br><br><br><br>He kicked too, but that was all pride<br><br>For soon you might see twas all over<br><br>Soon after the noose was untied<br><br>In darkness we waked him in clover--<br><br>--and sent him to take his ground sweat<br><br><br><br>Oh, the night before larry was stretched<br><br>Well the boys they all paid him a visit<br><br>A bit in their sacks too they fetched<br><br>For they sweated their duds till they ris it<br><br><br><br>For larry was always the lad<br><br>When a boy was condemned to the squeezer<br><br>Would fence all the duds that he had<br><br>For to help his poor friend to a sneezer--<br><br>--and warm his ol gob fore he died<br><br>--and warm his ol gob fore he died